Random Thoughts

29 Oct

Days In The Blackberries Field R63-2

I just woke up from the dream.
There was the mystery that I’ve tried to solve.
I wrote the long letter to the criminal from the dream.
It took me almost an hour.
I wanted it to be perfect.
After reading it, I decided not to send it.
I was feeling bad while I was writing.
Imagining myself reading a reply made me feel even worse.
I don’t know what to do with it now.
There may be answers hidden to all important questions we ever asked.
I am afraid that I am right, but I am not sure if I am ready for the truth.

* * *

I talk with myself a lot, every second when there are no people around.
These conversations are aloud, but I am the only one who hears the voices.
I hear only one voice to be more precise.
My voice.
I am the creator and the narrator.
People say that walk can help you in clearing your mind.
I usually feel like my mind was hit by tornado.
My walk last night brought me all possible ghosts from my past.

* * *

I live with the thought that I’ve changed myself a lot since I was happy.
Blaming yourself every single day and trying to change is not a pleasant job.
I had several flashbacks.
Tonight I discovered the truth.
I have never left the mold that I fitted in as a teenager.
The country where I was born doesn’t exist any more, nor the life I knew.
I always had everything I wanted.
I don’t know what I want.
I was rised to love and to be loved, to care about others and to believe in people.
People are changed.
I am the same.


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