stars wait in line
to get bath in the city lights
Aurora is shy
In response to Carpe Diem’s Special #70, Alexey Andreyev’s “Evening sky”
evening sky —
over the city lights
stars hardly seen
(c) Alexey Andreyev
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Beautiful take on the prompt!
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Thank you very much.
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🙂
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Stars and children aren’t quite the same, are they? (Ever see a kid clamor to take a bath?)
Punishing the Night
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Did you want to say that I missed the prompt involving imagination over the limit? That’s just the way I saw the image. I am not an expert for haiku, so making mistakes doesn’t surprise me. Those who try, make mistakes. Thank you for reading. I appreciate your comment.
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Excellent haiku Shy … maybe this haiku will become more wonderfull as you replace ‘to’ from the first line to the beginning of the 2nd line. Just an idea …
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Sorry Sky … I spelled your name wrong …:-)
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Yes, you are right. It is much better, I will correct it. Thank you very much for your feedback, I must admit that I was nervous a little, thinking that it’s maybe too abstract for haiku. I haven’t even noticed “h” 🙂
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It’s my task to give feedback and I hope that my feedback can help to let grow the joy of writing haiku.
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You are right…the only way to create poetry …. is to write poetry… lots of it! I loved the mystery in your poem!
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Thank you Wabi Sabi for taking your time on reading it and encouraging me. It means a lot.
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Very beautiful. Thank you for sharing Sky-
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Thank you so much, Cindy.
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You’re doing fine. There is no mistake. In poetry/haiku, there is no right or wrong. It’s our own personal interpretation. Just continue writing. We all get better with practice! 😉
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You are right. Thank you for the support. 🙂
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never really thought of the stars wanting the city lights. Wonderful twist.
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Thank you 🙂
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Oh how can the stars beenvious of the city lights?
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Yeah… Sounds silly, I know… But, grass looks greener on the other side… 🙂
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And there’s all that city action..
dancing city lights
mock the big dipper’s slowness
– to the disco beats
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See?! This sounds great! Than, why is it so impossible that one little distance star wants to feel that? 🙂 I like your haiku.
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